I am the kind of person who gets attached to things very easily, and it's incredibly difficult for me to let go of something once I've latched onto it. Even the smallest good thing that walks into my life can become very important to me—a person, a place, an event, an object, anything. That attachment almost always leads to a crippling fear that I will lose whatever it is I am holding onto so tightly.
I become terrified that the good thing God gave me will be torn away, never to be replaced by any blessing ever again. This causes me to hold all the more tightly to the good thing until it becomes an unhealthy thing. Instead of enjoying the blessings He puts in my life at just the right time, I grow miserable because I feel like I will lose everything and live without joy until the end of time.
But here's what God has been teaching me...
God is Good. He is the only goodness there is. And He cannot stop being good, and He does not stop putting good things into my life because He is also Grace. I don't deserve good things, and I don't always even ask Him for them. But because He is good, gracious, and unchanging, He is always going to put the perfect amount of good things into my life at the perfect time. If He allows a blessing to fade away, like a friendship, He isn't going to forbid me from ever having a friendship again. He will always, always give me what I need.
My Father has been teaching me to place these good things into His hands, to hold them loosely and trust that He will provide as my spirit needs. Although my progress often falters, I am learning to have enough faith to go where He leads and trust that He will continue to bless me with the things that make life beautiful. The good things in my life might change, but they will always be there.
God does want me to grow and often uses hard circumstances to do so, but so far He has never asked me to live a wretched, joyless existence. Also, I'm learning to simply enjoy His blessings and be thankful even when they are taken away. Life is a lot less miserable without irrational, crippling fear tainting every meaningful, good thing.
"If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children,
how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him!"
EDITOR'S NOTE: Mercy, one of my dear friends, wrote this as her status on Facebook, and I asked for permission to reprint it on our 412teens blog. She has a lot of wisdom for a girl who is not even 20. I hope you may glean from her transparency. —Cat