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How do I get over a bad break up?

I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this. Break ups can be terrible. There is no disputing that. I don't want to presume to know exactly what you're going through, but I do know it may feel like the worst thing you've ever gone through right now. Fortunately, there is a lot of biblical truth that can help us get through any difficult time in our lives, break ups included.

First, remember that God works all things for good purposes.

Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Recognize that if God allowed this break up to happen, then it is for the best at this point in your life. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." You may not understand why the relationship has ended, but you can trust that God knows. Years from now, you may be able to look back and see what God is seeing right now.

By your own understanding, your situation probably seems pretty bad, but you never know how God can turn it around and make it into something good. When you want to see the hand of God moving in your life, the phrase "hindsight is 20/20" is particularly accurate. When you're in the middle of the storm, it's hard to keep a positive, godly outlook on things. When you come out the storm, and you WILL come out of it, you'll be able to look back and see how God shaped you as a person through this trial and your future will be clearer.

Second, remember to keep things in perspective.

A break up, no matter how hurtful it feels now, will never be the end of the world. Over time, friendships can heal. Broken hearts will mend. There are other people in the world who will appreciate you and love you for you. Keep focus on Jesus, and what His word says is true about you—do not dwell on the pain of the storm. Romans 8:6-8 says, "For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God's law; indeed, it cannot. Those who are in the flesh cannot please God." Keep your mind on God and His care for your heart. Recall what is important to life and separate that from what is temporary.

Jesus never said that life would be easy. In fact, He said we would certainly face trouble in this world (John 16:33). But God will never leave you and will always guide you toward His will. Talk to Him about your pain. You can even yell at Him in frustration; He's big enough to handle it. Philippians 4:6-7 reminds us, "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

May God grant you peace and comfort and wisdom as you go through this break up. The sun will come out tomorrow, and you will have a whole new day to conquer. I promise.

TL;DR

A break up, no matter how hurtful it feels now, isn't the end of the world. You may not understand why the relationship has ended, but you can trust that God knows. Years from now, you may be able to look back and see what God is seeing right now (Romans 8:28). Jesus said we would face trouble in this world (John 16:33), but God will never leave you and will always guide you toward His will. Talk to Him about your pain. Yell at Him in frustration; He's big enough to handle it (Philippians 4:6-7). Tomorrow will be a new day, and your heart will endure.

By: Jeremy V.

Jeremy is a homeschooled high school student. He enjoys teaching spiritual truth and helping out at his church. He believes in the sufficiency and objectivity of Scripture over the subjective and unreliable nature of the heart (1 Timothy 3:16; Jeremiah 17:9). He also enjoys pin trading, marksmanship, and visiting theme parks.

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