How can I overcome peer pressure?

"Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death." —James 1:14-15 (NLT)

"But it's just one drink."

"Seriously, your parents will never find out."

"Why don't you cuss like everyone else?"

"Don't you want to do this too?"

We've all been there. Peer pressure is so hard to deal with. If we do give in, we feel awful for not standing our ground. If we don't give in, we end up getting teased or having to deal with more pressure and pleading. It's almost always an awkward encounter.

Even though it feels like an issue exclusive to being a teenager, adults often find themselves in the exact same position—being pressured by others to go against their morals and values. That's why the Bible actually addresses how to handle the universal problem of peer pressure.

Managed Expectations

"Everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution." —2 Timothy 3:12

People have been trying to tempt each other to go against their morals and values since the beginning of humanity. As Christians, we feel especially aware of our sinful temptations and convictions because of the Holy Spirit (John 16:13). Yeah, it can be frustrating to be so aware, but really, how wonderful it is to have a built-in moral compass. It takes the guesswork out of knowing right from wrong.

It can be difficult enough to live a godly life—without having people giving us grief about our choices. But unfortunately that does seem to be a part of following Christ (2 Timothy 3:12). So it's important for us to understand how to recognize problematic relationships and have a plan for avoiding or handling those awkward—sometimes painful—situations.

Recognizing Unhealthy Friendships

"Walk with the wise and become wise; associate with fools and get in trouble." —Proverbs 13:20 (NLT)

When so-called friends or loved ones tempt us with sins like underage drinking, premarital sex, vandalism, stealing, drugs, bullying, etc., that's a sure red flag. True friends don't ask us to compromise our morals or values or try to convince us to join in something that we don't want to do.

If someone in your life is (non-ironically) telling you, "But everyone is doing it!" RUN AWAY. As if somehow sin is no longer sin just because a lot of people are doing it. Um...no. That's not how that works. True friends support your moral convictions—even if they don't agree with you.

Living in God's Light

"You are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God's very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light." —1 Peter 2:10 (NLT)

As Christians, we're called to live differently from a world that has no problem with sin (1 Peter 2:9-10). Holding to God's standard to the best of our ability is a part of the process of spiritual maturity (Romans 12:2). Even if resisting peer pressure means a bit of temporary embarrassment in front of our friends, we'll eventually find that it's 100% worth it (Proverbs 13:20; 1 Corinthians 15:33).

Why Resistance is Good

"God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." —James 1:12 (NLT)

Temptations to sin come from so many directions—social media, Hollywood, and, of course, other people in our lives (James 1:12-15). When we choose to resist those temptations, we'll be rewarded with personal growth, emotional maturity, and positive progress on our spiritual journey.

How to Resist Peer Pressure

So what advice does the Bible have for standing our ground about our moral convictions and godly values? Here are a few!

Avoid Trouble in the First Place

"Dear friends, I warn you as 'temporary residents and foreigners' to keep away from worldly desires that wage war against your very souls." —1 Peter 2:11 (NLT)

Most of the time, the activities that people try to pressure us into are obvious disasters waiting to happen—even without a Christian worldview. Many schemes that are dreamt up for spontaneous wild fun, to kill boredom, or just because someone didn't want to be alone in their curiosity, will end in a lot of complications, parents finding out, and some kind of consequences or discipline.

From a spiritual standpoint, resisting pressure to sin is good because choosing sin displeases God and misrepresents Jesus. And from a practical standpoint, it's usually best to avoid things that are going to cause harm in various ways or get you in trouble with authorities.

Be a Good Influence

"Be careful how you live. Don't live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. Don't act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do." —Ephesians 5:15-17 (NLT)

As Christians, we have the privilege of knowing what lies behind the sin that honestly seemed like a good idea at the time. We are called to be the voice of wisdom when everyone else is turning toward sinful desires. During those times of peer pressure, perhaps you can take the perspective of making this an opportunity to stand up for what you believe in and help others see what consequences may come from a bad decision.

Who knows...maybe once you tell them why you're not going to give in to temptation, they might be interested in learning more about why you feel this way, thus opening the door to talk about your faith.

Ask for Help When You Need It

"The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure." —1 Corinthians 10:13 (NLT)

Remember that God loves you and wants to help you out of those tight spots (1 Corinthians 10:13). Ask Him to help you fight the temptation to give in to pressures. If you don't have friends who keep you accountable to your own spiritual growth and convictions, ask God to bring you friends who will better support you and your values.

"Be on guard. Stand firm in the faith. Be courageous. Be strong." —1 Corinthians 16:13 (NLT)

ALSO SEE:

• Do non-Christians have easier lives?
• What is true friendship?
• Is temptation a sin?
• Is it wrong to be annoyed by people?
• How do I do the right thing?
• Why is accountability important?
• How can I have healthy boundaries?
• What is the conviction of sin from the Holy Spirit?
• What's the difference between my conscience and conviction from the Holy Spirit?
• Why are personal convictions important?
• When Christians Have Different Convictions